I say my body needs laughter as much as it needs tears
Both are cleansers of stress and depression
And someone from the crowd asks ‘when was the last time you cried’
Should I riposte that, I thought they all saw how my eyes are drained
I’m exhausted, my eyes are exhausted from tearing
My mind is exhausted from overthinking , I’m mentally overwhelmed
My heart is screaming from hurting
The whole me is just exhausted
My marriage to pain feels perpetual
I pace down all day and come back to a quiet house,dark room, exhausted pillow
If this pillow had a voice, I know it wishes to retire
I wonder if it understands I only have it to wail to
There’s need for the crowd to know this – I don’t need someone to be the world to me
I don’t need someone to sweep me off my feet
I don’t want someone to promise me the sun and the moon
I definitely don’t need someone to die for me; keep those lies to yourself
I don’t….
I have really cheap wishes ;
I want a chest to lie on for a night, someone to kiss away all my pain
I want someone to help me ascend that carousel which I definitely can climb on my own, funny
Will it be too much to ask for someone who promises to lay on the grass and stare at the stars and moon with!
If all my wishes won’t come to be then , I want my pillow to laze, to cuddle tears of joy at least
Is that too much to ask!
UTTERLY COMPELLING 