Staying positive does not mean things will turn out okay. Rather it is knowing that YOU will be okay no matter how things turn out.
Staying positive has got to be everyone’s expectation of them and others over the years. It has become an anthem and mostly in this current century where technology is revolutionised and on far another high level. Social media life encourages you to stay positive always because people you follow are only preaching positivity, so why not follow that? Celebrities you love are talking of positivity on their posts, so why not embrace that? Whenever I log onto my Instagram page eighty percent of the posts I come across while scrolling down are people’s pictures captioned with either positivity quotes or just general positivity nothing complex like it could only be a vibe. Like when they quote “positive vibes only”, “staying positive is the new norm” and the rest. Most of these social media life is a scam. Trust me if I were a public figure or a celebrity this instant I would love people to see that I’ve got all my shit figured out and that goes the same for the people you look up to or you follow on the platforms.
I’m not against staying positive actually it’s a very healthy emotion to incorporate in your daily lifestyle but what you have to understand is you can’t stay positive always. Lost your job?Great! That’s an opportunity to explore your passions. Boyfriend or girlfriend broke up with you? Might as well be an opportunity to explore your sex life. Parents disowned you? Might lead to your road to freedom. You see all this positive responses encourage you, they make you feel like it’s okay to have gone through that, I mean it’s not the end of the world after all but the truth is life is not always sunshine and stars sometimes its rains and rainbows. Just because you’re encouraging yourself doesn’t mean its going to be easy, staying positive even when your business is falling is not going to assist bring it up in fact it might frustrate you even more and maybe depression, mild or severe.
A friend asked me of a business I had ventured into and I said it was difficult. I wasn’t lying when I said that. I know he expected me to be all about positivity as he even asked why I ventured into it in the first place and of course he added about being positive. When I was walking into that business I didn’t tell myself it was going to be smooth. Every road has a bump. I knew challenges would be there but also something good would come out of it. If we only took onto things because they are easy we wouldn’t have famous entrepreneurs or lawyers or engineers. We wouldn’t have anything for that matter because the road to any career or success is bumpy. Sometimes you just want to quit school. I mean waking up early, doing exams and stressing over how your GPA will go about each semester. Who wouldn’t want a stress-free life?
As Mark Manson quotes in his book, sometimes life sucks and the healthiest thing you can do is admit it. People betray us. Businesses fail. School sucks. Things you didn’t expect happen and life is full of shit and that’s okay. He also goes ahead to say, denying negative emotions leads to experiencing deeper and more prolonged negative emotions and to emotional dysfunction. He adds that constant positivity is a form of avoidance, not a valid solution to life’s problems. One important thing I’ve taken from him is that negative emotions are a necessary component of emotional health and to deny negativity is to perpetuate problems rather than solve them.
So it’s okay to not feel positive today or to wake up tomorrow feeling like shit.
Check out my book Men In Her Life on Wattpad https://my.w.tt/GH3c8uiCF9
XOXO 🧡 🧡